Yes, it’s time once again for another installment of Better Know a Members, today we have Nick Roloson the Vice President of the College Democrats
CP: Thanks for sitting down with me
NR: I’m starting to regret this decision
CP: You’re the vice president; John Adams said the position of Vice President is the most meaningless position ever created by man, would you agree?
NR: I will not
NR: Well by definition the Vice President is supposed to take the position of the president incase he can not fulfill them, so the VP is ready.
CP: Isn’t that a fancy way of saying, you’re just waiting until he dies?
NR: I don’t think so
CP: Are you waiting for Edgar to die?
NR: No but if he does I’m ready to take office
CP: Now as vice president do you want to be more like Al Gore or Dick Cheney?
NR: I’ll say Al Gore
CP: So you want to gain 50 pounds?
NR: IF being more like Al Gore than Cheney entails 50 pounds then I’ll take the sacrifice
CP: Why do you care about politics?
NR: Oh my god, you’re asking me a serious question
CP: They’re all serious questions
NR: Politics is important because it governs every aspect of your life from the moment you wake up until the moment you go to bed, from every person you know to every person you don’t know
CP: Is that why you joined the College Democrats?
NR: I joined College Dems because I wanted to make a difference, in my community, in this community and in the world community
CP: The world community, do the College dems have that much influence?
NR: Directly no, but the connections in the experience you get helps you 15,20,30 years down the road
CP: what’s the number one issue facing the college democrats?
CP: What do the college democrats do besides take road trips to Ithaca, throw drunken parties, and run amok on campus annoying your angry dean?
NR: Well, we service a community
CP: Isn’t that illegal?
NR: We do community service events, lets say it like that. We help get local officials elected, we open up networking and job opportunities for our members, and we keep the respectful and intellectual political discourse on campus alive
CP: you’re a white male from an affluent suburb on Long Island, why aren’t you a republican?
NR: Because I reason
CP: Finish this sentence, I hate republicans because…
NR: Well I don’t HATE republicans, I simply disagree with them. I don’t believe in their core values
CP: If you could pass one law right now what would it be?
NR: We’ve passed so many laws giving power to the national government, any law I’d pass would simply be to repeal most of the laws and executive orders passed over the last seven years. Although, I’d like to pass through the Kyoto protocol.
CP: so you believe in global warming?
NR: I do
CP: Have you seen any glaciers disappear?
NR: no but maybe they’re already gone
CP: but maybe they’re all still there
NR: I guess you got me
CP: So why are you so adamant in your support of Ron Paul if you’re not a republican?
NR: To spare the details, there is a difference between neo conservative, and conservative. He is at heart a good person, he wants to eliminate poverty, he wants to help the middle class, he wants to make the US image in the world better, it’s like the democrats with the exception of domestic issues
CP: So you’re a conservative democrat?
NR: Depends on what your definition of conservative is
CP: I mean like Lieberman, are you Joe Lieberman?
NR: I would not consider myself to be Lieberman
CP: Is it because he’s Jewish?
NR: That is one reason why I’m not like him
CP: What do you think about the current situation between Barack and Hillary?
NR: I think it gets overplayed a lot, I think she’ll drop out by tomorrow, this has just built up a political machine for the democrats but this machine isn’t going to hurt us, it’s going to help us in November, but as I’ve said before if anyone can lose in November it’s the democrats.
CP: But don’t democrats rage against the machine?
NR: We don’t rage against it, we just like to change it
CP: So you’re like Neo from the Matrix?
NR: In what way?
CP: You can change the machine
CP: So what do you say to Hillary supporters?
NR: Don’t be discouraged, you fought the good fight, but at the end of the day we did win fair and square, Obama won fair and square. We have to come together as a party and we have to realize that McCain is just another 4 more years of Bush and whether you support Hillary or Obama we both have to realize that is not a good idea.
CP: Let’s get local, recently our governors have admitted to various crimes, please just say yes when I name a crime you have committed, prostitution …. smoking marijuana … cocaine use … smuggling illegal immigrants across the border … shot someone … nothing? Ok so what’s the most illegal thing you’ve done?
NR: I think I jay walked 20 minutes ago but that’s about it.
CP: College Republicans…douche bags?
NR: they are a long awaited asset to the school
CP: but why?
NR: because it allows for political discourse to arise instead of having one dominant party, I’m glad the College Dems pushed hard to allow the College Republicans to form
CP: So like Darth Vader, are you their father?
NR: we’re the motivational uncle
CP: Like Uncle Jesse
NR: except better looking
CP: You’re better looking than John Stamos?
NR: Collectively yes
CP: So what events are you looking forward to most next year?
NR: Everything is still on paper, but if we get everything done that we’re working on, either the get out the vote concert or the blue ball
CP: why not more than one? Why not have two blue balls?
NR: If the people want two blue balls, we’ll give them two blue balls
CP: Are you saying right now that you’ll personally see to it that everyone gets two blue balls?
NR: Yes!…wait a minute
CP: Do you plan on doing any events with the College Republicans?
NR: Voter registration drives, the concert, but nothing is in stone, we’ll also try for joint meetings
CP: if you think the College Dems and College Republicans will meet together, then the only joint you’ll have is one in your hand
CP: Brian Lestz was the president your freshman year, bad president or the worst president?
NR: Neither, he was a good president. Wait, wasn’t Shamil the president? Granted I never saw any of the president but he was still a good president
CP: So who is the worst?
NR: I’ve only seen one
CP: So he’s the best and the worst?
NR: Fair compromise
CP: Worst president ever, got it… thanks for sitting down with me